Interoception and the Stories We Tell Our Bodies
I’ve been using a somatic hack lately—one that relies on a concept called Interoception.
To back up for a second, we basically have three ways we experience the world:
Exteroception: The 5 senses. Perceiving the outside world.
Proprioception: Knowing where our body is in space (how you can touch your nose with your eyes closed).
Interoception: Awareness of what is going on inside us. Hunger, heart rate, the urge to use the restroom.
Here is where the hack comes in. We are constantly feeling internal sensations and immediately slapping a label on them. We jump from Interoception (sensation) to Emotion (story) in a nanosecond.
The Anxiety vs. Curiosity Reframe In my body, anxiety often shows up as a constriction in the chest. A tightening. When I feel that, my brain immediately says: "Oh, I’m anxious." But recently, I’ve been pausing in that gap. I feel the tightness, and I ask: What else could this be?
Physiologically, the sensation of anxiety is almost identical to the sensation of curiosity. Both are about the unknown, and about anticipation. When I choose to label that chest flutter as "curiosity" instead of "anxiety," my entire experience shifts. I reclaim my agency.
The Trap of Bypassing Now, a critical caveat: We cannot use this to gaslight ourselves. If I try to convince myself I’m "curious" when I am actually terrified, that is just emotional bypassing. Sometimes, anxiety is just anxiety. The body knows the truth. In those moments, the "hack" isn't to lie to myself; it's to change the grammar. Instead of saying "I am anxious" (identity), I say "I am having a sensation of anxiety" (experience).
Men and the Anger Trap This work is especially critical for men. I see a subset of men who unknowingly interpret every uncomfortable body sensation—grief, sadness, fear, vulnerability—as Anger. Why? Because culturally, anger is often the "acceptable" emotion for a man to display. It gets a response. It feels active. It isn’t vulnerable.
In my men's work, we try to slow down that process, and get curious about what’s underneath. When a man feels the heat rising, we ask: What is actually happening in the body? And, What’s the emotion underwear the anger? Often, what we find underneath is a deep sadness. And once we name the sadness, we can actually tend to it.
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